Our wedding is quickly sneaking up on us, and the excitement level is getting real. We’re actually in really great shape, for all intents and purposes, but there are still many details left to figure out. One thing we’ve always known for sure, however, is that our wedding will not be of the traditional variety. We’ve always loved the idea of really making it our own, and we’ve both questioned and challenged a ton of the typical wedding to-do’s along the way. We’ve gone back and forth on a number of them, but following are a few wedding traditions to skip (and feel pretty darn good about, too).
To me, the idea of a first dance is wonderful in theory. But in practice? The thought of slow dancing in the middle of a room with all eyes on us makes us both a little queasy. Neither Justin nor I are the centre-of-attention type, and we quickly recognized that this tradition makes us feel more awkward than anything else. Instead, we’re planning on selecting a handful of our songs – the ones that mean the most to us – without telling a soul. And when the mood strikes, and one of our songs comes on, we’ll have our own semi-secret, yet equally special moment on the dance floor alongside all our loved ones.
There are many wedding traditions that are rooted in antiquated ideas, and when we really break it down the thought of my parents “owning” me in any capacity just feels a little odd for everyone involved. Of course, the vast majority of folks no longer view this tradition in this way, but it still just feels a little unsettling. In lieu of our reverend asking our parents for permission to “give” me away, we’re going to be asking for all of our parents’ blessings instead.
I mean absolutely no shade when I say that this tradition is one of my wedding pet peeves. To each their own, of course, I mean no harsh judgement. But not only do I find it awkward to single out, well, the singles… but the feminist within me balks at the idea that you may need “luck” in any form to find a suitor. In addition, I feel strongly that finding someone to spend your life with is absolutely wonderful, but I don’t think it’s the be all and end all to life. There is nothing wrong with being single – you do you, my friend! On top of it? We’re spending a pretty penny on my bouquet and I want that bad boy to last as long as it can! Ha!
This was the one tradition that we went back and forth on a little, but ultimately decided to toss. We both ultimately feel like they’re one of those things that most people won’t notice are missing. The thought of having to package up one-hundred-plus tokens to pass out to our guests feels overwhelming, not to mention wasteful (and expensive!) The name of our wedding game has always been to keep it simple, and this is one of the ways we’re paring back.
Historically, this tradition came into play when the majority of weddings were arranged. The thought was that if the groom, never having met his bride before, met her before she walked down the aisle and he didn’t like what he saw he’d have the opportunity to change his mind. Again with the ick factor. Instead, we’ve decided to meet before the ceremony to exchange our own private vows in a much more intimate setting. And, to be totally honest, this is the moment I’m most looking forward to.
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