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Feb 23

Lessons in Self Doubt & Other Scenes from my Week

bathI’ve been pretty open and candid about my battle with anxiety over the last year or so, and I have to admit that it feels really wonderful to be able to open up in that regard. Lately, I’ve had a lot of highs and lows which, for me at least,  often correlates to significant changes on the horizon. I’m most definitely not the first one to discuss mental health in relation to social media and how dangerous the comparison game can be. And while I try to avoid playing said game, I’m most definitely guilty of it – especially as of late.

Social media used to be a really powerful tool that allowed you to grow your brand and business rapidly and see immediate results. These days it feels like you have to work significantly harder to see significantly less feedback, and that can be incredibly discouraging. It leads to a lot of self-doubt, a lot of negative talk, and a lot of comparing yourself to other folks who don’t seem to be struggling (reality check: everyone is feeling this way).

I realized this week that not only is the comparison game incredibly damaging, but it’s also the literal opposite of gratitude – which is something I used to pride myself on – and something I seem to have lost sight of lately. It seems so obvious now, but I’ve realized that said game not only feels detrimental to your own self-worth, but it’s totally absurd, and also clouds your ability to be grateful for everything you DO have. I am so grateful for my health. For my friends and family. For my beautiful home, and our upcoming wedding, and our sweet and fluffy puppy. For this community. For YOU! And am bound and determined, now more than ever, to STOP the madness once and for all. I’m still working on figuring it all out and would love for each and every one of you to join me.  In the meantime, I hope you have an incredible weekend, and here’s a peek at some of the lovelier moments of my week. (Bear in mind, these are 5 photos from my entire week. It is my highlight reel – I promise you that!)

{above: a Sunday well spent}

sources: tub caddy | mug | tea | the best face mask | bath salts

rose perfume

{arguably better than real roses}

Processed with VSCO with a6 preset

{willing spring to make its debut with fresh flowers}

spa {a spa day in celebration of our one-year proposal-versary (it’s a thing!)}

Processed with VSCO with a6 preset
{Sage, vintage rug afficianado}

source: vintage rug | note: my favourite vintage rug sources can be found right here

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  1. Amy says:

    I took Instagram off my phone this week. I took all apps off my phone except for Audible and Spotify. No FB. No IG. Nothing. I’ve got better things to do with my time, and if that means not a soul reads my blog, so be it. I’ve got better things to worry about….no not worry about. ;) Your dog is adorable, and that rug is fabulous.

  2. Nicole says:

    Love this post! Keepin’ it real, girlfriend. That’s why I follow! Love your feed, and blog.

  3. Susan says:

    Love your openness that I can absolutely relate to, thanks for sharing :)

  4. Debbie says:

    I always appreciate your thoughtful, honest and sensitive posts about your struggles – struggles we all face in one way or another. Have a beautiful weekend and thank you!

  5. Tiffany LaBelle says:

    Thank you for being so sincere nd open with your audience. You are not alone in the challenges you face. Also, a picture of a cute poochie like Sage always brings a smile to my day!

  6. Cynthia says:

    Your honesty is refreshing! Remember that true joy is in the journey and out of pain a purpose is born! You are a light in the world of social media just by sharing your true feelings :)
    I feel significant changes on the horizon too….and it follows a time of real struggle at work and some serious self reflection. I’ve learned that there is power behind purpose….to overcome obstacles, to maintain an incredible passion for what you do….and to remain in a position of influence .

    Keep Shining!

  7. Rach says:

    Did a social media detox this month because I started to feel the same way as you and I’m loving it! I am going to do it again when that feeling starts creeping up. Less negative noise in my brain this month for sure. Good luck!

  8. Linda says:

    I thoroughly enjoy your site and hope you can continue to work your way through your situation. Look at what you’ve accomplished. There are many envious (not jealous, as that’s negative) others who are not brave enough to take that first step towards something they’ve always wanted to do.

    I would like to recommend a book. It will help you to stop ‘resisting’ (creating energy blocks) and to ‘let go of the outcome’ (and let the Universe handle things) that you see for yourself. This book is amazing, and I keep re-reading certain pages (marked with pencil and post-its for easy reference) whenever I feel myself feeling more negative. Quit as much of the social media as you can. I rarely check my FB page. I tried to disconnect but I kept receiving e-mails with ‘notifications’ and thought I could just look, but it immediately re-connects you like you never left. I have canceled Twitter as well. Other than Pinterest, which is just fun, and where I re-pin from your posts (thank you for those pics) I’m dis-connected.

    The book is “The Universe Has Your Back – Transform Fear to Faith by Gabrielle Bernstein – best selling NYT author. I have recommended it to all my friends who are in need. Big hugs… xo

    • I am legitimately ordering that book IMMEDIATELY. I FEEL the blocks and I FEEL the resistence – which is my biggest hurdle right now. Thank you so much for sharing – I already feel in my gut that this book is going to help

  9. Nadine says:

    ” Comparison is the thief of joy”‘ Theodore Roosevelt. Social media and its curated galleries can make us feel ‘less than’ so your talent as a designer, as well as your honesty about your struggles, keeps me loving your blog & Insta pages. Not to mention I love dogs!

  10. Peg says:

    I may not always comment, but I think you’re lovely and talented and kind! xoxo

  11. Lesley says:

    I love your blog! I enjoying all of your post and check it everyday. It’s very refreshing for you to share what you have been going through. I think that everyone, no matter how successful or confident that we think we are, have times of insecurity, doubt, and confidence. We have to sometimes reevaluate and count our blessings for what we do have in life. I stay away from as much social media as possible although for some businesses to be successful, some social media
    needs to be used to some extent. I started a blog 3 or 4 years ago but gave up on it mostly because of my lack of confidence to make it successful. Maybe one day I’ll pick back up on it and try to make it successful. Hope you have had a great weekend and had time to recharge!

  12. Corinne says:

    Thanks for being so truthful and open! I also struggle with feelings of self-doubt when I see others in my profession on social media who are “thriving” when I am “struggling.” It’s never been more true that “comparison is the thief of joy.” I’m with you in the struggle for gratitude – wishing us both luck!

  13. Mandy says:

    This message came at the perfect time for me! I have recently relocated and I am now trying to build a design business without contacts or clients. And while it feels like social media is the best way to get my name out there, I am continually plagued with self doubt and fear. It is a fine line of researching how other designers are promoting themselves, while not getting sucked into comparing all their success to my inital hardships of starting over from scratch. Thank you for keeping it real with all of us! You are definitely someone I follow as a great business example.

    • Yup, yup, and MORE yup. I totally and 100% relate to this in every day. Have you ever read the book “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway”? It helped me big time when launching my business. Sending you love!

  14. Tilesbay says:

    Love this post!! Thanks for sharing. :-)

  15. Roxanne says:

    Hello Jacquelyn, so sorry to learn of your struggles. Know you are not alone. I have a quote posted on my dream board with my inspirations, “what’s for you never goes past you”. It provides me with peace. Another one, “start where you are when things fall apart”. Know that we wouldn’t keep coming back if we weren’t impressed with you. You have been very inspirational to me. One of my dreams is to have Jacquelyn Clark help me with my interiors. Sending you my best wishes full of happiness and sunshine each day.

  16. Victoria says:

    Thank you for being so brave and honest. I don’t know about you but I find it really comforting when I hear that other people are experiencing the same anxiety and doubts that I am. It’s easy to feel alone and like you’re the only one struggling, so you being honest about what you’re going through is really kind. Also, I’ve never thought about comparison and gratitude in that way, so thank you for giving me something to reflect on.

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